Its really sad when you see that little heart on facebook say someone's ended their relationship.

Strange to think how the whole thing sort of happened or why it did in the first place and which parties are feeling the hurt.
I saw these two the other day, but I knew the outcome from the very start because I was let in on the secret of the year and I felt bad seeing them both just being together. I think it was a cruel trick because when you do that to someone its just completely unfair and unjust especially if it was seriously pre-meditated. It kinda makes me sick when I think about it too much. I hate also knowing what happened, or at least guessing to the point of knowing, it makes me not want to go to school tomorrow and see this person. I know what she did, but something good did come out of it.

Either way school is gonna suck so hard tomorrow its not even the least bit funny and I hate how this stuff always works out, it makes me wonder why I always get myself into these situations and I can remember writing these words before. Why don't I ever do anything about this! You think a girl would learn.... Either way I shouldn't think about such things so often.

Today was an awesome day, I got to go home early and I also got to hang out with my sex and run around the city and harass people, Like wally world, Tim Hortons, and, of course, Indigo were I put creepy sayings on all of the computers. Either way I always have a blast with that one! Takes me quite some time to get comfy with people, but I do believe I have.

I don't like the whole drug scene actually, the other day I was with some other people and they all smoked from a hooka and just looking at all of them made me realize how pathetic that life is and how easily you can get sucked into is. I think this experiance was good although quite gross and the most uncomfortable I've ever been. Also I got to drive in a car when the driver was stoned to hell and back which also made me shiver with terror (I figured out that I litereally shiver when I am nervous or cannot say something).

I know who I want to be with for a long time and who I only have a passing friendship with I just don't know how to deal with all of this added stress and I wish I had a map for this sort of stuff. Its kinda like a trap, you're lured in by something fancy and amazing, but once you are inside its like a whole different world in which you wish you were never drawn in but kept a safe distance like the others.

Its really crappy when you notice this.

Either way I think whenever you do soemthing you should ALWAYS take a second look and decide if its really worth it.
Like another situation of mine which is funny becasue it is kinda the same people, but anyways.... I think that the weirdest feeling in the world is being used for your younger brother. Its so strange because I don't know what to do with that either because evertime I see this person I feel unintentionally cold and mean which is quite bothersome because it leaves me in a sour mood for the rest of the day. I mean I love my little brother, but I dont think that they should have to go through me, its really just torture on my side. I'm pretty sure in genereal all of my friends love my littler brother more than me because he is very "cool" and nice and I love o have him around me because I like him, but hes more of a charmer than I am. I love my brother because no matter how popular he is with my friends he will still come after me if I leave the room or if I ask a favour or however mean I am he still asks me to play games with him. He is seriously my favorite person in the whole world because I know no matter what I can or will do to him he will still be right there behind me waiting for me. No matter what happens.

"Cant remeber a time when she felt needed"
-savage garden


Life is strange, but wonderful in time.